Minnesota couples who are going through child custody proceedings may find themselves quarreling over visitation schedules and fretting over their ex-spouse’s competence at parenting. Two people who want to be involved and loving parents should be able to hash out an acceptable child custody schedule. Experts say there are a few questions that parents can ask themselves to ease the transition into a child custody agreement.
The words you use during your divorce proceeding may have a potent effect upon your children. One of the ways in which parents unconsciously show that they may have hang-ups about the child custody process is by referring to their children as “my daughter” or “my son.” This is an important distinction — try to re-frame the situation by referring to “our children.’ After all, it did take two people to produce these new, young lives! Taking the time to share the kids you love with your ex-spouse will pay off in the long run.
Parents can also benefit from challenging some of their own unreasonable beliefs about the divorce. For example, many parents are threatened by the idea of a stepparent loving their children. Parents only need to think about the possibility of their kids going without love altogether to realize the value of additional emotional support for these young lives.
Experts say that parents should also abandon the idea of “winning” during child custody agreements. These arrangements exist to promote the best interests of the child, not to pit one parent against the other. A Minnesota family attorney may be able to help parents feel as though they have “won” by doing what is best for the kids, even if it is uncomfortable at times. A lawyer can serve as a valuable advocate and ally for parents who are going through child custody litigation.
Source: The Huffington Post, “How to Avoid Making Your Lawyer Rich or Damaging Your Children” Krista Barth, Apr. 01, 2014